DMV Has No Sense Of Humor

I think that’s clever. I chuckled. But no longer. A Virginia man had the pictured license plate, and today it was revoked by the DMV. It may be silly, but 11 people complained, and via Aaron Morrissey over at DCist:

According to WTOP, the Virginia Department of Motor Vehicles hastaken away a Virginia man’s “Kids First” vanity plates, which he personalized with the six-letter tag of “EATTHE.” Yes, the plate read “EAT THE KIDS FIRST.” The DMV apparently decided that the “plate advocated performing oral sex on children”.

That’s right. The same people who can’t run computers are absolute arbiters of public decency, and they will judge your language in any way they see fit, even when it’s a patently ridiculous interpretation. It takes 11 people to have their precious sense of outrage tipped, and you’re done. Check out the painfully humorless and judgmental DMV letter:

You feel that the “common sense” interpretation of your plates should outweigh any offensive meaning that a few people might find. Although you may not have intended to violate DMV Guidelines, DMV must conduct its review neutrally since citizens who observe the license plates do not have the benefit of knowing and understanding why you chose that character combination. Even if some people (like his church group – ed) think your plate is humorous, other individuals find your plate to be disturbing. [Redacted] stated that citizens may view the message as “socially offense or disparaging” by being “disrespectful towards children, having a low opinion of children, or belittling children.” She also noted that, as some people initially view the plate, “the vision of cannibalism of children conjures a truly horrible image.” Others may view the message as being “vulgar in nature,” associating “eat the kids” with oral sex. Finally, [Redacted] believes that most people would find that meaning to be repulsive.

So your precious sense of outrage and the DMV Guidelines are absolute and sacrosanct. The DMV and the loudest busybodies you encounter will and should dictate your level of ‘responsibility’ and ‘consideration’. Your sense of humor, community, and free thought are irrelevant. I sincerely invite Ms. [Redacted] to go take a flying [redacted].

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One Response to DMV Has No Sense Of Humor

  1. BadgerDave says:

    “belittling children” well yeah, most of them are MUCH too big to get down in one piece (and any cook knows that even shaped/sized pieces cook much more evenly.

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