If you were to read the fine print on Chipotle’s website, I would gather it might warn eating two burritos within 24 hours without practicing Michael Phelps’ training regimen could be hazardous to your arterial health; but silly advice like that would have kept Morgan Spurlock an average guy of whom no one had ever heard. In a quest for greatness and fame of this magnitude (yeah, I know this is both trivial and highly unlikely to garner us any fame), sometimes you have to throw caution to the wind and go for back-to-back days. We won’t mention who actually went for back-to-back-to-back days thanks to a business card free lunch winner, but he really likes swimming wallaroos.
Luckily for us, our second trip to Chipotle in two days did follow some intensely fought soccer and softball victories on the makeshift athletic fields of our National Mall grounds. So armed with voracious appetites, about half the softball team headed to the M St. Chipotle on foot. This location is the one that is below ground level under Penang restaurant on the crowded 1800 block with Malaysia Kopitiam, Ozio, some new bar that took over the old Madhatter’s space, and Camelot Gentleman’s Club among others. This block has always struck me as an odd looking one for D.C., as it seems to take on the qualities of a block in Manhattan, maximizing its space like no other D.C. block with all the basement restaurants and bars below other establishments.
Tonight’s dining group astonishingly included one twenty-three year old male who has collectively spent at least a year and a half in D.C. and was eating Chipotle for only the second time ever. He may have only had one Chipotle option in Pittsburgh, where he has spent most of his recent years, but how many of you know a
twenty-three year old guy that wouldn’t hunt for burritos like a lioness with three cubs to feed in the dry season. We’ll give him a pass though since he has enough on his plate dealing with the childhood memories of his mom ironing creases into his sweatpants to look presentable since he refused to wear any other kind of pants.
- Today’s menu: Vegetarian bowl with black beans, fajita vegetables, red and green tomatillo salsa, corn salsa, s/c, cheese, lettuce, and that wonderfully complimentary guacamole.
- Geographic Location: A (At the dead center of the map, transportation options are abundant. You can walk, bike, bus, metro, take a presidential motorcade, or repel with the window washers.)
- Handicap accessibility: F (All stairs in this basement, all the time.)
- Tortilla wrapping: B+ (Snug as a bug in a rug)
Location tip: For a young lobbyist or junior associate billing sixteen hours a day across the street, you could kick your feet up with a burrito followed by a fireside drink at Sign of the Whale and a laugh at the D.C. Improv. Alternatively, if you had to work through Thanksgiving instead of traveling home to see your family, you could spend it Barney Stinson-style.